The end of summer approaches! I know it seems early, but I have to start working on my classroom as soon as possible. The week I 'actually' have to go back is full of meetings and such, so I need to start NOW! I feel like summer has barely begun and it's already time to get back to work. I know that I love teaching, and I love the little miscreants who I teach, but I just can't stand the idea of leaving my own little munchkin. He will be staying with my mother in law, which is great (she lives super close by and adores the crap out of him, as well she should), but I hate the idea that I'm not there. I want to be the one holding him and talking to him and watching him do new things. I've already told her that she won't be seeing any of his firsts. She may THINK she does, but really he waited for mommy and daddy before it actually happened.
Does going back to work make me a good mommy or a bad mommy? I don't think there is an answer to this. Duckie is in school full time, so to live in our lovely house and to drive our lovely cars and to eat our lovely food I need to keep working. So, work = good mommy. On the other hand, I'm leaving my precious little munchkin with someone other than me. He will miss me and be a clingy little monkey when I get home. So, abandoning child to go to work = bad mommy. But staying at home also comes with the lovely stigma of society that I don't do anything all day and I must just sit around eating bonbons. NOT TRUE! I get to be SAHM during the summer and working mommy during the school year. Best and worst of both worlds!
Now, you need to understand that I suck at housekeeping. My house is much messier than I like and I can never seem to get anything done. While there may be bonbon eating on occasion, it is only because that's the only food I can reach while the Captain is napping in my arms. That bonbon was breakfast. Or lunch. Possibly both. What do I do all day? I have no freaking clue. I nursed the baby. He napped in my lap. He woke up, I changed his diaper and nursed him again. He napped in my lap. He woke up, I set him in the crib so I could pee, he cried while I did this, I changed him and nursed him again. So yeah, I keep a human being alive. No, I can't run an errand for you or babysit your child. Sorry. I know I'm a teacher, and so therefore the most awesomest babysitter ever, but no. I don't babysit. I spend time with my child, and I panic about the next school year (during the summer) or plan for the next day or grade papers (during the school year). The reason I don't bring your child home with me after school is because if you don't take your child away at the end of the school day I will lose my mind. The reason summer is so long? Survival of the species. If teachers had to teach year-round with no breaks (I'm not talking about the year-round schooling that has breaks, because that's OK) they would all go insane. There would be blood. Possibly death. It would not be pretty. I don't want to see children outside of school (apart from my own). I don't want to have awkward supermarket conversations with kids and their parents. Don't get me wrong - I love the shout and wave. You see me in the store, you shout my name, maybe run over for a hug, no problem. Takes 3 seconds and everyone leaves happy. Awesome. But don't look in my shopping cart! You don't need to know that I'm buying beer, wine, and coolers. You don't need to know that I have an unhealthy addiction to Jane Austen movies. You don't want to know these things. Trust me.
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